Tomorrow marks the one year anniversary of my last day of work at my old job. I seriously can't even believe it! It's been a really crazy year, with some major highs and some major lows, but I definitely wouldn't change it for anything. 

 

After my last day at work one year ago, I came home to an empty apartment. Not only because it was all packed up (we were moving to Rochester in 2 days) but also empty because Mike had moved up a week before I did. So with nothing to do, no one to talk to, and so many emotions going on in my head, I sat in our closet and wrote this post. I contemplated posting it that afternoon, but figured I should wait on it... and then I just never got around to it.

 

In honor of the one year anniversary, I'm finally hitting publish. I kinda just want to do it for my own sake, so I can always look back and remember how I felt that day. {It's funny- it still makes me tear up even a year later!} Maybe this could even help someone else who's about to take a big leap of faith! :)

 

Today was my last day at work.

 

Last.  Day.

 

Wow.

 

It's the weirdest feeling, leaving a place where you've spent the past 4.5 years.  Leaving your coworkers who you've spent 8+ hours a day with for the past 4.5 years.  Leaving your office and your desk and your favorite parking spot.

 

The title of this post is a bit misleading.  In fact, quite misleading.  If I was going to be truthful, the title would have to be something like "How to Quit Your Job While Crying Uncontrollably and Turning into a Big Blubbering Mess but Trying to Keep it Together Until You Get to the Parking Lot so that You Can Cry Without People Seeing You"... but I'm fairly certain no one would click on that post.

 

I don't know what to do with myself.  Luckily (?) our cabinets are empty so I can't drown my sorrows in ice cream or chocolate.  I haven't really mentioned it but Mike is in Rochester already, so I've been flying solo during the most emotional week of my whole entire life.  It sucks.  All I want is a big Mike hug and for him to tell me that it's all going to be okay :(

 

Luckily my mom came over last night (how do moms always know when you need them the most?!) and gave me some much needed love and hugs and told me that everything would be fine.  Thank you, mom!  You are the best ever.  I don't know if you know how much I needed that!

 

Now it's 2:30pm and I'm home from work (perk of quitting, I suppose, is that you have no work left to do so you might as well dip out early).  And now I've taken up residence on the floor of our empty walk in closet to write this post with a mountain of kleenex at my side.  I don't know why I sat in the closet but it's turned out to be quite cozy.

 

 

So here we are.  I am officially unemployed.  Saying goodbye to everyone sucked.  I am such an emotional person-- I could barely keep it together.

 

Yesterday my amazing coworkers gave me a going away lunch (with Chipotle!) and my boss said the nicest things about me.  I hate hearing nice things; it makes me want to cry!

 

And I did.

 

Then I had to get in front of the crowd and get an award and open my presents and say nice things about my coworkers.  It made me want to cry.

 

And I did.

 

I said goodbye to half of them yesterday afternoon (lots of people take off on Friday) and the other half this afternoon.  It was so hard to say goodbye!  I wanted to cry.

 

And I did.

 

Tomorrow night my family is having Mike and I over for dinner to say goodbye.

 

I'm sure I'll be crying. (edited to add: yup, of course I did)

 

But you know what?  The moral of this story is that it's okay.  I'm not going to be embarrassed about being emotional.   These people (my family and my coworkers) have seen me grow up and are unconditionally supporting my decisions.  And it's not like I'm making a normal decision.  I'm making a crazy decision to quit my job and move to a new place with nothing lined up!  And they all still support me.  That, my friends, is worth some tears.

 

So let me tell you something:  if you find yourself able to break free from your job and you decide to take that leap?  Don't worry about saying goodbye.  Yeah, it's going to suck.  But embrace it!  Listen to every word everyone is saying to you, whether it makes you want to cry or not.  It's okay to feel really sad about leaving your family.  It's okay to feel really sad about leaving your coworkers.  It's okay to feel really sad about leaving your friends.

 

You do you!  Emotions and all.

 

The best advice I can give you?  Invest in some waterproof mascara.  You're going to need it.